“The Parental Grapevine!”
A Cluster of Transformational Parenting Practices
“Mom and Dad Don’t Have a Clue!”
There comes a time in the life of many teenagers when they reach the conclusion that Mom and Dad don’t have a clue about much of anything … especially them! Many teenagers start suspecting this around the age of 13, but it’s not until they are closer to 16 that the realization gets embedded in their consciousness. After that, every interaction with their parents confirms it: “Mom and Dad Don’t Have a Clue!”
The Mantle of “Independence!”
At Parenting Your Teen for Life, we see this all the time. We take it very seriously, but we recognize it as simply a phase that virtually all teenagers go through. Think of it as a Rite of Passage – your teenager leaning toward Independence. The “Upside” of all this is your teenager wants to start taking more responsibility for him or herself. This includes making more decisions … Independent of You. There is nothing uncommon about this. At every stage of development, our children want more Independence than we are willing to give them. If the truth be told … even toddlers want Independence!
The Power of Influence with Our Teens
The most parents can hope for during their teenager’s Rite of Passage is to continue to have Influence in their son or daughter’s life. Our ability to maintain this Power of Influence will depend on whether or not we have a strong emotional Connection with our sons and daughters. That Connection will evolve naturally from us performing the 8 Transformational Parenting Practices. The eight Practices are characterized by our Statement of Commitment:
“I will Love my teenager Unconditionally.
I will Communicate with my teenager Responsively.
I will be Wise, Watchful, Patient, Prayerful, Stouthearted and
Stay Actively Involved in my teenager’s life.”
When parents of teenagers around the world band together, share our wisdom and celebrate our parenting victories … we all will have more “Juice to reach our mutual End Goal!”
At Parenting Your Teen for Life, our “End Goal” is simple …
To Help Parents
“Establish a Sacred Bond between themselves
and their teen-children that is rooted in the
8 Transformational Parenting Practices.”
These Practices enable Parents to continue to have Influence with their sons and daughters when they no longer have Control over them. Try not to bristle at this statement. The two truths below cannot be disputed or denied … no matter how much we resist accepting them.
(1) Parents simply do not have the same level of control over their teenagers as they did when they were young children and early adolescents. This is neither a Myth nor a Mystery. It is simply a fact. We cannot be with our teens or track them throughout their day 24/7.
(2) The most we can hope for is this: Their upbringing will kick in at crucial moments when they have to make “character defining” decisions. We hope that our guiding Voices remain in their head and heart … and that our Prayers will strengthen them in those crucial moments.
At Parenting Your Teen for Life, we are committed to helping every parent raise emotionally healthy, well-adjusted, hopeful, confident teenagers who are excited about their future.
Parents who adopt the 8 Transformational Parenting Practices discover “first hand” what it takes to make their teenager Tick, Talk & Transform … and in that process “They Get a Clue!”
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