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Category Archives: Effective Communications

Summer Break – Make It Count! Part 2

June 19, 2016

“The Parental Grapevine!”

A Cluster of Transformational Parenting Practices

  Malbec Grapes

Summer Break – Make It Count!  (Part 2)

As most of you know, the underlying theme of this blog and everything we do at Parenting Your Teen for Life … is rooted in our belief that the quality of Parent-Teen relationships impacts virtually every area of a teenager’s life.  As a result we are always trying to create or uncover and share effective ways of improving the Bond between parents and their teen-children.

I am aware that some parents don’t feel they have a strong Bond with their teenager.  Some might even say the Connection to their teen is ambiguous, at best.  More often than not, these parents are eager to find ways to pull their son or daughter close … to protect and nurture their Parent-Teen relationship.

Throughout the school year, our teenagers are heavily involved with academics, extra-curricular activities and their friends.  Parents have limited access to their teens.  And when we have them within earshot, we’re often barking orders or “laying down the law” about something our teen did or didn’t do … which created Consequences that had to be dealt with.  These and similar situations chip away at the Bond we would otherwise have with our sons and daughters. read more …

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Summer Break … Make It Count! Part 1

June 15, 2016

“The Parental Grapevine!”

A Cluster of Transformational Parenting Practices

  Malbec Grapes

Summer Break – Make It Count!

Parents!  There are a ton of programs and activities to keep your teenager happily engaged and entertained throughout the Summer Break.  Many of these programs and activities are designed to make the summer a “Rockin’ Good Time!”  Other programs are cleverly crafted to keep your teen Amped-UP so that he or she returns to the classroom in the fall … fully prepared to do well academically.  My point here is — you have lots of choices!

As you examine your options, I’d like you to consider one that I put together for you and your teenager.  It’s called “Summer Break – Make It Count!” and it’s not so much a program as it is a Project that’s performed in a series of Free-style Conversations.  The Project is designed to help you and your teenager re-Discover each other and re-Vive your Parent-Teen relationshipSound Ambitious?  It is!  But families who embrace the Summer Project know first-hand that it’s a positive Game Changer! read more …

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Revive Your Parent-Teen Relationship!

May 19, 2016

“The Parental Grapevine!”

A Cluster of Transformational Parenting Practices

  Malbec Grapes

 Revive Your Parent-Teen Relationship!

“Blood” is essential to sustain human life.  “Communication” is necessary to sustain human relationships.  I believe the life-blood of relationships is Communication … but not the same old yackety-yak we may have heard growing up!  Parents today have to interact differently with their sons and daughters when they become teenagers.  This is not easily done, especially when our teens prefer debating us rather having an agreeable conversation.

Allow me to challenge you.  Can you name three parents (excluding yourself) who have enviable relationship with their teenager?  Notice I didn’t ask you to name “families” … that might be nearly impossible.  So I’m asking for individual parents.  Can you name three?  I hope so because if you can’t … things are worse than I thought.

Strong Parent-Teen relationships are the first line of defense against families falling apart at the seams.  Families that fall apart figuratively end up in divorce, separation or other forms of estrangement.  Families that fall apart spiritually get lost in a fog of irreconcilable differences, unforgiveness, bitterness and depression.  In each situation, family members often feel lost in a private hell they cannot escape. read more …

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Teen Culture … Veil of Secrecy!

April 24, 2016

“The Parental Grapevine!”

A Cluster of Transformational Parenting Practices

Malbec Grapes

Teen Culture … Veil of Secrecy!

Teenagers growing up in the 21st Century have a bottomless “Pit” from which to draw a variety of self-destructive activities.  If you can imagine some of these activities … they are already in the “Pit” and waiting for our sons and daughters to grab hold of it.

Our teens have greater access to the “Pit” because Teen Culture promotes the Lie that experimenting with Drugs, Alcohol and Prescription Medicine is normalThe New “Normal!”  Teen Culture reinforces the following messages to our teens via music, movies, billboards, television and social media …

“Get Real!  That’s what teenagers do!”  

“You’re going to experience life at some point anyway!”

“It’s all part of growing up!”  

“No Big Deal!”

The challenges our teenagers deal with and the daily choices they have to make were foreign to us when we were their age and unimaginable to our parents when they were teenagers.  The Age of Innocence disappeared several generations ago … and there’s barely any evidence of it left.  I remember the Brady Bunch and the Huxtable Kids with amusement … but those nostalgic days are no more.  Poof!  Gone!  But you already know this.

The New “Normal!”

What I refer to as The New “Normal!” is often terrifying to parents.  Now imagine how terrifying it must be for our sons and daughters, especially those who choose NOT to identify with The New “Normal!”  I refer now to some of our teenagers who make positive choices and have Goals and Dreams they want to pursue.  These are fun-loving teenagers who are NOT interested in Getting High, Sexting or indulging in reckless irresponsible behaviors that jeopardize their health, safety and wellbeing.

The teens I refer to now are NOT winged-Angels.  They occasionally screw up and miss the Mark!  But their parents are proud of who they are becoming.  And each and every day, these teens try hard to behave in ways that make themselves proud of who they are becomingas they lean toward more Independence. read more …

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Parenting in the Early “Middle” Years … Tart!

December 17, 2015

“The Parental Grapevine!”

A Cluster of Transformational Parenting Practices

  Malbec Grapes

 Parenting in the Early “Middle” Years … Tart!

Here’s the 2nd Excerpt from “Mom and Dad Don’t Have a Clue!” Remember, we’re still looking back in time at what may have been your early parenting experience.

Level Five: Maintaining Control – A Delicate Balance!

Level Five is where parenting really gets dicey. Honesty and clear thinking on your part … is critically important. Ask yourself a bold question:

“Is controlling my teenager the most important thing to me?”

That question is critically important because it goes to the heart of your ability to cope with, recover from, and celebrate after the Turbulent Teen Years have run their course. So before you answer the question, let me interject a thought … read more …

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Parenting in the Early Years … Sweet!

December 13, 2015

“The Parental Grapevine!”

A Cluster of Transformational Parenting Practices

  Malbec Grapes

 Parenting in the Early Years … Sweet!

Do you remember when parenting your child was a breeze? Most days felt like a “Play Day” for you. From Infancy and even through the Terrible Two’s, you were the Effective Parenting wiz. You were a Star Performer! Remember how other parents envied your child-rearing skills? Why wouldn’t they. You had a model child by any standard.

Back then parenting your child was stress-free. Your Pride & Joy was a wonderfully behaved little person. If Childrearing were an Olympic Sport, YOU would have been a Gold Medal Champion!

Okay, now let’s drop-kick that “Fantasy” down to a Level One Reality! read more …

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What Society Expects of Parents! (Part 2)

November 12, 2015

“The Parental Grapevine!”

A Cluster of Transformational Parenting Practices

  Malbec Grapes

What Society Expects of Parents!  (Part 2)

We do not live in the world of our grandparents.  That fact alone changes EVERYTHING!

The universal “response” of parents to the commitment of the Network of Solidarity would be:  Appreciation!

“We cannot watch over our children and teen-children 24/7, but we know it is critically important that they be watched over.  So we Welcome, Value and Appreciate every effort of the Network of Solidarity to “fill-in” for us … to ensure the wellbeing of our sons and daughters.” 

Parents would have to be careful NOT to divulge the identity of members of The Network because that would render them less than effective with our children and teen-children.  If our children found out how information about them was being funneled to us, it could undermine the purpose of the Network of Solidarity.

Parents would use every means at our disposal to make certain there is NO abuse or twisted intentions in the relationship between our sons and daughters and other adults in their lives. read more …

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What Society Expects of Parents – Part 1

November 10, 2015

“The Parental Grapevine!”

A Cluster of Transformational Parenting Practices

  Malbec Grapes

What Society Expects of Parents!  (Part 1)

Ever wonder what Society expects of you as the Parent of a teenager?  If not, let me clue you in.

You are expected to fulfill your parental obligations with or without the tools you need to do that job well.  Here’s what’s “Real!”  There are parents out there who tell me they would do “Jumping Jack” backflips if they had a little help with their son or daughter when they really need it.

And those parents don’t mind being specific about the help they want … whether it sounds realistic or not.  Here’s what they say they want:

⊕  An enhanced GPS “Tracking Device” — to let parents know when and where their teenager is going to go AWOL or is NOT going to use their handy cellphone to call home at a reasonable hour.

⊕  A fully functioning “Mood-Swing Detector” — to send parents an Alert just before their teenager blindsides them with an emotional meltdown for no apparent reason.

⊕  An all knowing “Crystal Ball” — to give parents a hint about what their teenager is thinking when he or she shuts down and refuses to talk … for no apparent reason.

Neither of these desires is frivolous … but it’s not likely that Society can deliver them! read more …

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Fire Up Your Parental Engine!

October 22, 2015

“The Parental Grapevine!”

A Cluster of Transformational Parenting Practices

  Malbec Grapes

Fire Up Your Parental Engine!  Part 1

Today I’m offering ALL parents of teenagers an opportunity to get a free copy of my special report titled “Fire Up Your Parental Engine!” It’s a 19-page eBook available to everyone who completes the Email Signup form on the right side of this webpage. If you’re reading this post somewhere other than on my website … go there now to complete the Email Signup form.  You’ll be emailed a Link to download the eBook.

www.ParentingYourTeenforLife.com

A word of caution. If you are easily offended or don’t really want to read about “New Possibilities” to improve your Parent-Teen relationship … don’t bother signing up. You might not be able to stomach “Fire Up Your Parental Engine!”

I, affectionately, refer to the eBook as a Gift wrapped in lovely layers of unrelenting Tough Love. Others might describe it as an Iron Fist in a genteel Velvet Glove. Grab a copy and reach your own conclusion. read more …

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Celebrating Parents – The Wind Beneath Teen Wings

September 17, 2015

“The Parental Grapevine!”

A Cluster of Transformational Parenting Practices

  Malbec Grapes

Celebrating Parents – The “Wind” Beneath Teen Wings!”

In last week’s blog I wrote the following about “Teens with Dreams!”

“I believe the more we celebrate our young people … the more inspired, motivated and positively challenged they will be to believe in their Dreams and in their ability to manifest them. I also believe the “Teens with Dreams!” series will help parents function more effectively as the Wind beneath the Wings of their teenagers who have Dreams.

I want us to begin celebrating the Wind beneath the Wings of “Teens with Dreams!” So today we focus on the Parent of Danette MaKaila … Dr. Linette Montae. You will recall from last week that Danette is the 17 year-old CEO of her company.  Dr. Montae is on my radar this week because she is the Wind beneath her daughter’s Wings in creating a thriving successful business. read more …

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