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Teen Culture – Reality Checks and Balances!

November 19, 2015   

“The Parental Grapevine!”

A Cluster of Transformational Parenting Practices

  Malbec Grapes

Teen Culture:  Reality Checks and Balances!

We do not live in the world of our grandparents.  This fact alone changes EVERYTHING!

The phenomenon referred to as the Turbulent Teen Years is not an Urban Legion. It has been well documented … and it usually occurs when your child reaches any age that ends with the word “teen.” That would be 13, 14, 15, 16 … you get the idea. The Turbulent Teen Years are specifically labeled for good reason – they are phenomenal.  And all phenomena bear watching very very c-l-o-s-e-l-y.

If you are parenting a teenager, you are probably well acquainted with Teen Turbulence. No doubt you can recall all the Turbulent situations your teen created and the questions you muttered under your breath at the time:

“What was she thinking?”

“Does he even have a brain?” read more …

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What Society Expects of Parents! (Part 2)

November 12, 2015   

“The Parental Grapevine!”

A Cluster of Transformational Parenting Practices

  Malbec Grapes

What Society Expects of Parents!  (Part 2)

We do not live in the world of our grandparents.  That fact alone changes EVERYTHING!

The universal “response” of parents to the commitment of the Network of Solidarity would be:  Appreciation!

“We cannot watch over our children and teen-children 24/7, but we know it is critically important that they be watched over.  So we Welcome, Value and Appreciate every effort of the Network of Solidarity to “fill-in” for us … to ensure the wellbeing of our sons and daughters.” 

Parents would have to be careful NOT to divulge the identity of members of The Network because that would render them less than effective with our children and teen-children.  If our children found out how information about them was being funneled to us, it could undermine the purpose of the Network of Solidarity.

Parents would use every means at our disposal to make certain there is NO abuse or twisted intentions in the relationship between our sons and daughters and other adults in their lives. read more …

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What Society Expects of Parents – Part 1

November 10, 2015   

“The Parental Grapevine!”

A Cluster of Transformational Parenting Practices

  Malbec Grapes

What Society Expects of Parents!  (Part 1)

Ever wonder what Society expects of you as the Parent of a teenager?  If not, let me clue you in.

You are expected to fulfill your parental obligations with or without the tools you need to do that job well.  Here’s what’s “Real!”  There are parents out there who tell me they would do “Jumping Jack” backflips if they had a little help with their son or daughter when they really need it.

And those parents don’t mind being specific about the help they want … whether it sounds realistic or not.  Here’s what they say they want:

⊕  An enhanced GPS “Tracking Device” — to let parents know when and where their teenager is going to go AWOL or is NOT going to use their handy cellphone to call home at a reasonable hour.

⊕  A fully functioning “Mood-Swing Detector” — to send parents an Alert just before their teenager blindsides them with an emotional meltdown for no apparent reason.

⊕  An all knowing “Crystal Ball” — to give parents a hint about what their teenager is thinking when he or she shuts down and refuses to talk … for no apparent reason.

Neither of these desires is frivolous … but it’s not likely that Society can deliver them! read more …

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Parenting – The Great Game of Show & Tell

November 6, 2015   

“The Parental Grapevine!”

A Cluster of Transformational Parenting Practices

  Malbec Grapes

Parenting – The Great Game of Show & Tell!

“Parenting” can be summed up in three words:  “Show & Tell!”  We parents model and teach our children what they need to know …. and we hope they will eventually apply it to their lives.  The challenge with teenagers is this:  They have the ability to judge whether their parents are speaking their personal truth or just giving lip service to ideals they don’t really live up to.

Teenagers will listen to their parents only as long as what we “Show” them reflects what we “Tell” them.  Not so long ago everybody called it “Walking Your Talk”some of us still do.  That’s why I refer to parenting as “The Great Game of Show & Tell!”  It is because our teenagers expect us to Model what comes out of our mouth.  If we fail to do this, they will eventually lose respect for us and call us Hypocrites.

When our sons and daughters lose respect for us … we lose our ability to have any “Influence” in their lives.  That’s a huge LOSS!  And some parents never recover from this.  Why?  Because teenagers have a short attention span where their parents are concerned … and Zero tolerance for Hypocrisy.  So we can’t monkey around with that. read more …

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